>>1753464
To be fair, it's not like Maririn is some greater writer; most of her stories boil down to either rape fetishes, or awkward situations between men that end in sex. Hell, most of her characters aren't really even written to have a full range of emotions 'most of the time', they just exist in a story snippet that had intercourse within it. Not that this isn't fun, but think back to all of her stories, and then think about what really separates most of her characters from being generic males who happen to fuck some guy they know.
The problem with this story is that it wants to present itself as being some kind of deep narrative about two gay men who love each other, but that's not really what it is. Both of these two are barely servicable as characters, since you don't get a wide range of emotions from them.
Tobias does what he wants, even to the detriment of others, and Tyson just goes along with it. Example: Tobias doesn't like a roommate whose loud, he assaults them, then Tyson comes in and starts rooming with him beginning their relationship. Tobias wants a son, Tyson is hesitant but ultimately relinquishes any fear/hang ups that he has because he just wants to please Tobias. Tobias gets pissed off at his brother for the things his brother is saying to him, and he assaults him.
The write wants to present Tobias as being a strong, stable family orientated man, but he comes off mostly as someone who is used to forcing his way through life. If this was written to be a character study, then Tobias would have landed on his face more often than not, mostly because his actions would have been a detriment to himself and his social standing with others, but its not.
And sure, people can say that 'well, its a fantasy, and it shouldn't be taken seriously'.
Okay, but the writer wants you take the things that are happening seriously; that's why he added in the drama with Tobias' brother, the adoption of Elias, Elias' backstory with him being shunned, and the possibility of his Tobais' mother perhaps dying. If you he didn't want us to take any of this seriously, then why introduce these heavy handed topics? Maririn herself has tried to introduce some of this - the death of the military feline's father and ex-boyfriend - but she's clumsy with it, she doesn't really know how to fully write a character arch/study. Trying to interject porn into every story doesn't work, not because it can't be there, but because it ends up taking away from the gravity of the story. The best story Maririn did when story and porn mixed together was the one featuring the two cats and the fox, mostly because that was about two people trying to find an equilibrium in their relationship, however, even in that we really don't learn a lot about the felines, just some tentative backstory info, which, in itself is good, but you're left feeling empty and unsatisfied by the characters because it feels like you never got a chance to know them personally.
The same is happening here; we really don't know Tobias and Tyson all that well, despite seeing them go from teenager to adult. It just feels like they are inserted into various stories, of which they have nothing really to say about and do nothing with. The thought of these two living along together with a child is something that they will ace, because Elias is just a perfect kid. That's how he was written, so we'll never really get a chance to understand what frustrations, anxieties, or hardships go along with two gay men raising a boy in a modern setting is like.
For a better example of this, look at Circles. While yes, the 'child' in that story was a teenager, you still felt the fear, uncertainty and turmoil of the 'father figure' in that story having to help raise/rear him into becoming a worthwhile adult.
Another bad thing is that the problem with Tobias' brother, Jonathan. Hate him or pity him, but he's a symptom of a family that has certain issues that are not being explored. This presents us with a certain level of cognitive dissonance when reading the story, because that situation is an intriguing bit of chaos within the 'perfect' lives of the family. And yet it 'probably' won't be explored, but hand waved away because the writer has no real interest in developing any of the characters.
Case in point, Tyson has shown no opinion about Jonathan, despite the other assaulting him earlier on during their first interaction. He's not angry with him, scared of him, or even sad for him. Tyson treats Jonathan like an enigma that exists and because of that, we the audience are left wondering what the point of their of their first interaction was for them. We know it was to make Tobias look like a shining hero defending his unknowing boyfriend, but it also shows that Jonathan wasn't so much a character back then. He was a plot device that was used and then put away. This keeps happening with him: he shows up, mouths off, and then disappears. The only bit of character he's shown is being disgruntled at the dinner when Tobias/Tyson's families are basically discussing a business merger through their children (quite medieval of the writer).
So in that, we're left wondering what Elias means as far as the story is concerned. Why was created? What is his purpose in this story? Is he supposed to teach either Tyson or Tobias anything? And if so, what can he teach two people who are basically perfect on their own. And furthermore, what was the point of Tobias wanting a child? What does he need one for? An heir? It's a strange thing to want someone who isn't of your blood to potentially take over your business, since, unless he marries a cousin or something, he won't have any tie to his family or their legacy.
When the writer said that he wanted to write a 'wholesome story', I don't think he understood what he was saying, because there's nothing wholesome here. There's just a lot of sex, mixed in with a barebones world, that is lacking any real conflict or plot.
Think about it, Tobias' mother might die soon, but what has she really contributed to this story? Sure, she's a kind woman, but that's all she is. She's there to be a mother for Tobias and Tyson by proxy, but is anyone going to really care when she dies? Is that really going to affect the story any? The characters? Or even create something akin to tension? Is Tobias suddenly going to have a massive change in personality because his mother dies? Is this going to really affect Tyson or Elias, considering their lack of time around her?
Sure, you can torture the character with a slow demise, but again, that drama hasn't been earned because we the audience have not been treated to much of her personality to want her to stick around.
Again, Maririn tried the same trick with the soldier father, but it had the same effect. Because we didn't really know him, we didn't really care when he died. And the sudden shift in mentality from his son was mostly jarring because we didn't know him either; he's introduced from someone else's perspective and we're left somewhat indifferent to him when he is finally introduced. It didn't help that he didn't have much of a personality in his story, either.
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