>>1235962
the typical arguments against the twilight series are:
1) It's poorly written.
2) It's Mormon propaganda.
3) It depicts and glorifies an abusive relationship.
The truth behind the twilight vampires is cleverly hidden within the vampiric lore. Why are there creatures on earth thousands of times more powerful than they need to be? In the book, bella says that she's able to roughly exert the force of a cement truck rolling down an incline at 60mph, with her arm sideways while arm wrestling. I don't know about you, but I'm a lot weaker that way than almost any other way. How strong is she when lifting with her entire body? No natural process could possibly evolve this.
Vampires can apparently run across snow without leaving footprints, according to midnight sun. At the levels of acceleration they display, they should be putting huge ruts into the ground and getting quite wet, or muddy in warmer conditions. Yet they remain almost exclusively clean except when hunting. Do they have some sort of means of propulsion that does not require direct contact with a physical object? Perhaps subconsciously controlled?
Very importantly, why do the Volturi control the vampire population? It might be understandable now, with the advent of nuclear weapons, but what about in the past? Why would nigh-godlike vampires be hiding in sewers when they should be ruling like kings? Vampires can exert the force of a fully laden cement truck moving at 60 mph down an incline with a surface maybe 9 square inches in size without taking damage. That level of durability means they're invincible to practically every force known to man. Add to that, they can see individual dustmotes in a room; not just one, but all or any of them. The united states government would likely have to lure them into direct proximity to a nuclear bomb to destroy a single one, and vampires intelligence is boosted by the change as well, so it's not likely you could just convince them to go to the nuclear testing grounds. And if you tried to drop a bomb on them, they'd hear it or see it minutes before it hit ground, use their ridiculous strength and speed to sprint away at speeds in excess of 100 mph(running around a clearing in the blink of an eye?) and avoid, at the very least, the majority of the damage.
And, surprisingly important, why does their skin sparkle? That seems like an absurd mechanism for something already so insanely powerful as a twilight vampire. Traits evolve to ensure survival, and if vampires need the insane level of strength and speed they have just to survive, wherever they come from, you'd think they'd want a method of hiding, not of shining like a beacon in the sun. But why ONLY in the sun? If you wanted to attract attention, you'd think you'd want it all the time. So why only under high intensity light? The answer came to me one night when I was almost asleep; there is little in the way of an evolutionary answer, so it must be an engineered trait. That's when the rest of the puzzle fell into place, starting with the refracting skin...it's obviously laser armor. When they're in normal light conditions, they're cold, cold enough that they wont show up on Infrared scans, and dark enough and small enough to not be easily visible. But hit them with a high power laser, and the beam is scattered easily, reducing any potential damage to nil. Then back to hiding in the darkness of space.
Yes, space. Twilight Vampires are Alien Zombie Space Marines. Think about it! They don't need to breathe, so spaceships aren't necessary. They can maneuver without a physical object to push off of, so they dont need propulsion. They literally feed themselves on the blood of their enemies, so they have no need to resupply, and are constantly pushed into battle whether they want to or not. Once they reach an enemy spaceship, their tremendous strength and speed lets them decimate mortal creatures with ease. Even better, because of their ability to easily reproduce(the zombie part), all you need to do to conquer a planet is launch a single vampire at an enemy planet! The low-visibility projectile easily makes it through the planetary landing with their tough skin, and hungry from the long trip proceeds to look for a mortal creature to feed on. But it's weak, so it will likely bite many creatures and take small amounts of blood from each, creating large numbers of new vampires. As it regains its strength, it begins to bite even more people, converting them to vampires after three days; based on the statistics given in Midnight Sun, a vampire could probably kill 10 people a second, so we'll estimate lightly biting half that many. A single vampire could infect at least 10000 people a day.
After three days, new vampires start spreading like mad. In a week, you have a vampire army a hundred thousand strong, or a million strong, rampaging across the planet, eating everything with a heartbeat. In a month there are only vampires remaining, and in their bloodlust they'll begin to massacre one another. A year later, maybe a thousand of the very strongest and smartest vampires will remain.
A distant monitoring device will have been watching the vampire count on the planet. Seeing the stereotypical growth and fallback, it will deduce that another enemy planet has fallen, and send a device that will build a cannon on the planet to deliver the remaining vampires to new hunting grounds. Lacking anything to do on the now desolate world, they will happily move on, leaving a bare world behind, filled with harvested resources for the vampiric overlords to collect.
However, something happened on Earth that wasn't expected; of the first three vampires to be turned, the Volturi, one had the power to see every memory of anyone they touched. And, of course, the first thing he touched after being changed was his Sire, at which point he immediately saw the fate his world faced. Aro was not a normal vampire, in that he desired power more than physical gratification, and did not want to see his world harvested by the vampire overlords. So he convinced his two fellow volturi to help him kill the original vampire, destroyed the newborns using combined tactics that the confused newborns would be incapable of, trying to eliminate every vampire from the world. Of course, that was impossible; there were too many, and they were too fast. So Instead they lay down the laws; no revealing their presence to humans. Naturally this outlawed the rampages that were a centerpoint of the typical invasion, and they had to kill many vampires to finally get their point across, but eventually they seized power and managed to hold it, and protect humanity and the earth, for three thousand years to follow.
And that's why I like the Twilight Series.
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